there was a trapeze. enough said
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Randomize
