hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize