I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
Randomize
