shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa