whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
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