So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
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