Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
