he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Randomize
