After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
it's like iHOP with fire
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
