i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
She's the barista slut.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
