facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize