My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
