Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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