How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
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