There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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