i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Actions speak louder than pants.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
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