Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize