I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Randomize
