oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
The adults are the big ones right?
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
