I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
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