BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Please don't give away my fajitas
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
