and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Randomize
