she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
