BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
you didnt know i had herpes?
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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