It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
it's like iHOP with fire
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
