You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
