Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
