Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?