i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize