I smell stomach acid.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
