sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
