So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
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My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
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He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
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