Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Randomize
