Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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