Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
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