just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Randomize
