I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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