remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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