College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize
