new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
