I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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