Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
Randomize