Christians are straight up FREAKS
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
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