Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
