is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
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You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
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I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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