just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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