is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Randomize
