omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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