Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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