..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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