and you said cock pushups were impossible
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize
