just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
